im a bitch Mmmm, Ive been abit eviiiil lately and yes some of the evilness has been directed to the boy. It hasnt been intentional its just he hasnt been exactly willing to compromise when it comes to him playing his PC games and me wanting to sleep and have the game off.... After that he got up and went downstairs to eat something (his fave activity lol) and I went to sleep. I know I got afew hours of sleep before he came back up into the room and started playing his guitar-- which oddly enough I dont mind one bit. I love listening to him play, come up with new song ideas... just seeing his mind at work. Its pretty sexy if I do say so myself.... and than it happened. He went to play his online game and I turned eviiiil. I mean I was becoming tired again and wanting to sleep abit longer and as soon as I saw the game turn on I was like, "Oh, I know you arent about to play that" and he glanced over at me and I told him, "Fine, play it. You work all this weekend and I know your gonna be tired so Im gonna make sure I annoy the FUCK out of you" And he just looked my way or maybe it was a glare and than he said, "Why?" and I simply said, "Because..." which caused him to glance at the screen, turn it off, snatch a pillow from our bed and head off downstairs again.
Now, I seriously dont know why him playing those games turn me into insta-bitch but they do. I think its because I want the attention the game gets. I do in ways feel deprived of his attention... I dont consider him spending acpl hours with me discussing everything and nothing as 'quality' time and I guess thats why Im so pissy. Anyway, when I finally woke up we spent time together talking and eating lunch. Afterwards I convinced him to trim his toenails and since his feet were so dry and ashy looking I took care of them with lotion. All I know is this... I must really love him to mess with his toes/feet because I absolutely HATE!!! toes/feet, ewww ewww EWWW!
You know, while Im being super honest I'll make a confession... the last couple nights Ive been feeling real depressed almost to the point of wondering why Im here in KY. Wondering if its all a waste of time, wondering does he care and love me as much as he says he does cause alot of the times I dont really feel like a gf... I feel like, well I dont know I feel abit empty inside and I dont want to feel like that. I came here because I love him and wanted to start the next step in our relationship but in ways it seems to be going backwards, dont know if its just awkwardness or... what? Alright, Im done bitching. Oh, I do have three things to look forward too in the next few days though.. my aunt, grandpa and rog are coming up in another 2 days (I dont think the boy is too thrilled with this though since he mentioned possibly going & staying at his parents), Friday on the Science channel theyre having a deal on all the bugs and whatnot that live on the human body-- some of those critters look pretty scary. Almost makes me want to get a decent microscope and view my own lil critters which makes me wonder do the critters from ones body transfer over to say your loved one in those intimate moments? And if so, do they fight and maybe eat one another since its kind of an intrusion? Makes a gurlie quite curious... and lastly, theres this show coming on Discovery Health Channel about a Medical Examiner and all the things she does... THAT my dearies will be the coolest, ever. I cant wait~ seeing the previews makes me excited. :D
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