all about the boy
@ 12:40 am on 23 September 2004
Just some random thoughts....
I was up the entire night acouple nights ago and was watching some news show that came on early morn on CNN. They covered the whole beheading thing and whether or not Americans are becoming desensitized to it all. I had given it little thought but now that this latest beheading with Eugene Armstrong has happened I realize it hasnt really big a big story, like it was when Nick Berg was done in.
So, yeah Id have to say it appears that we are desensitized because weve seen it happen before and know what will happen it isnt as scary, it isnt as big of a deal because were becoming accustomed to this shit happening. Thats just as scary as the beheadings if you ask me....
Edit: I just realized that another one of the 3 hostages caught was beheaded, Jack Hensley. I saw the third hostage, a British man spend alittle over 11 minutes on tape begging for Blair to help free him, I suspect his beheading will occur tomorrow. :/
My folks mentioned to me tonight that they are thinking about going down to Louisiana for Christmas. I can understand where my mom is coming from; wanting to spend one Christmas with her family afterall the years my dad and her have been married but, eh, I dunno how I feel about it. Im not close to anyone on my moms side except my aunt and gurlie.... no doubt I'll be surrounded by a large group of assholes. Lucky me.
And than I have that whole issue of Christmas is supposed to be amongst snow and wintery type weather. I wont see that in LA, which sucks... and than I wonder if I do decide to go down, if Anth would come with me or not.
I know he mentioned before how he wanted to spend as much time with his dad as he could because of what his dad was going through with his health earlier this year but his dad has been doing well and to be honest, Anth hasnt been the busiest and yet he really hasnt called or went out to see his parents. I think the last time we were up to Morehead was last month sometime... maybe abit longer. Whats sad too is his mom calls him on his cell constantly and rarely does he call her back :/
I feel bad for her. It almost makes me wanna just call and talk to her. I like her alot, shes a sweetheart. I just wonder if it would be weird or if that would make Anth feel all weird- like Im trying to move in on his family. Hmmm.
Earlier, I was on the phone with my gurl and Anth out of the blue told me he loved me. I love those moments when you dont expect anything and you get something sweet in return. I smiled which I havent seen myself do as much as I have since Ive been with him. Its a good feeling.
Lates he came downstairs from playing his game and gave me a big, forceful kiss and told me he loved me. I loved how forceful he was, the way his lips felt on mine, how he made me feel at that very moment. I cant even describe the feeling but damn I wouldve loved to have just ripped off the little bits of clothing he was wearing and raped him. Heh.
So far, so good with the boy picking up after himself and helping out around here. Im impressed. :D
Now, the scary part is Ive been eyeing one of his online games.. Diablo. I find myself wanting to play it but around him being secretive, as if I hate the damn thing. I played it once before and didnt quite understand it all and gave up. But.... hmm, I cant help but want to play abit. In ways, this could be like some bonding thing for us... I can tell he wants me to play and take interest in something he likes... maybe I could give in alittle bit.
I was thinking too, that when school starts I'll rarely get to see him because of our conflicting schedules but hes switching to 2nd shift, so we'll actually get to goto bed around the same time and spend time together. Snuggling in bed with him sounds good to me. Real good.
I need a J.O.B. Job. My dilemma is this- I have 1.5 hrs to drive to school and back home daily. Do I look for work in Cinci after Im out of class and than make that drive, study, eat, spend time with the boy and sleep, than repeat.
OR
Do I look for work in Lexington/Winchester/Richmond (all are within where I live) after Im out of class and than make the short drive home, study, eat, spend time with the boy and sleep. Any ideas??
Wow, what a pointless entry. I gues not really pointless I just realized its mostly about the boy. That aint so bad though ;P
♥♥♥
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