yup, so im alil fucked up. I basically snagged this from technibeetle. The idea is to throw all your tunes on random and write down the first 20, sounds easy enough.
1. No Doubt- Running While these songs are playing I guess I'll update. Im pissed that I dont get OLN channel. What about me wanting to watch the PBR? Thats Professional Bull Riding for you amateurs. I guess a call will be made to the shitty cable co. and get it added. I dont think I could live without it. Maybe that makes me sad but who gives a fuck.
Im feeling pretty angsty today with a side of depression and lonliness. Something is seriously, seriously wrong with me. One minute all is well in my lil land 'o reality and than the next its all crashing down around me. My feelings for the boy are around that same level too. Sometimes I feel like hes with me cause no one would deal with him. Thats shtty on my part cause I know its not true at all. Anthony's an amazing guy and I know Im lucky to have him.... but sometimes (alright, most the times) I cant help but feel like he could do so much better than me. I also observe and take notice of entirely too much shit and than analyze the FUCK out of it until Ive analyzed it to my likings-- which means until its negative and against me-- only than am I satisfied with my decision Ive come too. I mean, really. If my self-esteem was about where most the population was Im pretty sure my opinions of me would be differently.... better, happier. I really do have no clue why hes with me. Im waiting for him to come home one day, all wisened up, and ditching my ass for someone prettier, skinnier and all around more kickass than I... and thats very depressing. I noticed the other day when we were out shopping and even at the reptile show that he never did stay beside me, it was always off on his own, in front or behind me. Like he was always trying to avoid me so as not to be embarassed by me. It depresses me. Than I have to wonder does he do that delibertly with the intentions up above Ive mentioned or thats just how he is? Fuck. I dont know. I think I think too much. Could I please borrow someones wonderful, conceited self-esteem for awhile? Anyways, come March Im thinking (there I go again!) if my head isnt right that I should leave KY for awhile and go home for acpl weeks. I could always go to VA Beach and hang with Robifiers for awhile but I dont wanna intrude and I really do just need some time to myself... to gather my thoughts and come to some life-changing decisions. Scary.
Hmm, what else has crossed my mind? Ive been seriously considering seeing if I could get that Gastric Bypass surgery done. Does that throw me in psychotic category? The lazy category? The desperate category? Maybe abit of all three, eh? Awesome.
Anyways, my songs are completed. Im too lazy to actually write down acpl verses. Seriously, if your that curious about verses, pull up online. Thank you. If I can get this right I shall include acpl kickass movies I made, heh. Oh, ye shall enjoy this. :D Poison Arrow Dart Frog --I know, it sucks but shit is hard to capture. You see if you can do better! Dammit. --This is the boys handywork. Notice how the frog is on our floor?!! I have no idea what goes through Anthony's head sometimes...
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